The quickest-of-updates Update.

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Just a quick update, starting with my dearest apologies for being such an inactive blogger. I’ll keep this update short so won’t get into too many details, hence it’s going to be more spontaneous and basically me, talking to ya’ll after a pretty long time.

So I’ve been busy, I know OLD excuse. But this time, as you may kinda know from previous posts, I was stuck with having to face the dreaded A-level exams. In fact, I’m still not done and I was actually meant to be studying right now but pffft. whatevez.

Anyway, my point being that I’m ALMOST done (got 4 left, to be precise..) and THAT leads me to begin day-dreaming about the time when I WILL be done. Naturally, I’m more than excited and just the thought of not having to deal with disappointing exam papers is so liberating. Also, I’m contemplating regarding my future endeavours and the ways in which I can make this blog, better (your suggestions would be help tremendously! ^^’ ) So yeah, these plans are on-going and I can’t wait to see what the future holds. 🙂 I don’t want to miss out on trying new stuff in the free time that I’m given so look forward to news on that, asap. 😉

That’s all for now. I know this isn’t the most exciting update but it felt right to be sharing at least something with the loveliest of readers that I could ask for! Have an amazing morning/afternoon/evening/night/supper/teatime/lunch/dinner/etc 😛

Take cares,
Toto.

A Grade Talk.

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Hi. How you doing? Hope you’re feeling awesome. ❓

So I’ve began to write not knowing what to write, and instead depending on this teeny notion that perhaps a good ol’ blabber session would seem something like you’d be more than happy to read. Shall I presume I am right in this belief remains, yet, to be seen. Teehee. 🙄

Anyway. I know I haven’t write in a while and I know I say that every time like it’s become an un-offical official intro but I really shouldn’t be letting this bond between punctual posts and me break into sad, unfixable pieces. It isn’t right and I’m responsible but I’m also set to give some insanely hectic A Level exams in about a month and just looking at the date right now gave me goosebumps. Thus, you can imagine my lack of presence on SoP, I hope.

On the matter of what’s new, I’ve had some recent rethinking on the importance of grades and as a result, frustrations of the typical education system(s) that are more like conveyor belts through hell. And I don’t mean to whine like this is the number 1 issue we face because oh God, the world’s got an entire plater of problems as it is but, eh, can’t help thinking!

Seriously though, the idea of “results define your future” is intended as a great way to encourage you but instead, it ends up doing more damage due to the way society tends to heighten it beyond belief. I mean, there is nothing wrong in trying to do (and be) the best in whatever it is you set out to do and in fact, you SHOULD be doing just that no matter if it is obliged or expected from you. I don’t mind that, AT ALL.

What I do mind is just the intensity with which I personally have spent the last, say, 8 months of my life feeling as though I am on a ladder, continuously climbing and climbing to a place I am told will open the doors to my future. And so, this sort of smudges the good intention of “just trying your best”, in favour of highlighting the tension and chaos and exhaustion that comes with wanting to have the “best grades”. You just phase out into this state of fixating your future and happiness ONLY to a bunch of alphabets and that shouldn’t be the case. You shouldn’t have to depend on a piece of paper to validate your worth or even have the world be eager enough to equate it directly to YOU, as a person.

Surely, no system of “education” would be considered “educational” were it to preach such values, would it?

 

And remember:

Too much of anything is good for nothing.

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Until next time,
Toto
😎

In your debt.

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Wrote this a while back, as gratitude for a teacher who helped in more ways than her job required. 🙂


The first poem
I wrote in
English Class
encouraged me
to be a less
horrible poet.
So I wrote to
impress you 
but who knew
you taught to help
us.
Not through those
‘frame sentences’
I loathed
but the time we
spent
supposedly
wasting
and ended up
making it
something 
I still
long for.
Not once, not twice
but countless times
you being there made
the difference.
Perhaps, it is no wonder 
then, that every poem
I write since when 
you made us write 
that very first;

I owe you.

Then again,
I owe a lot
more too.

-Toto

Figured Out.

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Better a cruel truth than a comfortable delusion.
― Edward Abbey

perhaps uncertainty is not so foreign after all
and we remain determined in proposing
that you and I reside in a place far more
orderly but look around to see the crowds,
a messed-up mass of people voicing this
confusion to sound all normal, like lying
to ourselves has become so supremely
human that you and I abide to those who

rise above others
proclaim beyond measure:

“we’ve got it all figured out.”

oh we, practitioners of delusion,
have perfected our methods, at last. 

 

-Toto
p.s.  featured image is the
 japanese symbol for ‘truth’

Much Punctual. Very Wow.

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Aye. Please find yourself some comfy sofa and a cup of english tea (or eh american coffee? o_O ) and let’s have a good ol’ chat.

How are you all doing? Everything going alright? I hope you’re all splendidly being awesome. (and if not, then ya know what they say? Keep Calm And Carry On!)

So I know I haven’t been able to post for so long now. As far as I can remember, I was never the kind to abandon this blog for more than 2 weeks (at max.), except for this time. Thus, it is a bit disappointing to set such a demotivating personal new record. But why haven’t I been a punctual blogger you ask? Well 2 reasons.

First of which was a weirdly-timed vacation. I had to go to Pakistan with the fam despite not have any official school holidays and that meant missing out on classes which in turn meant a lot of self studying or ahem lack thereof, to be more precise. Pffft, totally not surprising. XD

2nd reason was what followed my lack of preparation. Yep, you’ve guessed it: EXAMS. Wretched little things. I returned to KSA about 2 days before my first exam and I don’t want to get into too many details but exam time was a time of great panic and unspeakable terror. *shivers*

ANYWAY, all that is done with. Now, I’m on an official post-exams holiday. However, there’s still a matter that needs my attention. It’s one of those forks in life where you aren’t really very much in control of the path ahead and all you can do is DO the best you can, with what you’re provided. I will write about it only when I’ve dealt with it..so sorry for being all vague right now. I’ll explain soon. I hope. 🙄

On another note, my previous posts have mostly been random bits of poetry. It’s difficult not to write poems..? Odd, I know. There’s just something about my amateur attempts at poetry that I end up with a lot of hopefully okay poems. Wish I had a better reason but uhhh that’s all I can think of. Nonetheless, I still do miss writing longer pieces like I used to. They definitely involved a lot more thinking, phrasing and editing in general. But not to worry, I will try to get back to that format as quick as willingly as possibly (since you can’t exactly force yourself to write a certain way, I guess. not without enough practice at least!).

ALSO, HOW COULD I FORGET. It’s 2016 now. Old news, no? Much punctual. Very wow. I wish you all have a blessed new year that brings betterment for you AND your loved ones, in EVERY way. Likewise, ToW will (I pray) continue to grow in 2016. This blogging endeavour has already taught me so much and I dearly wish, with all your support, I get to learn even more.

I personally can’t help but feel a certain mixture of awe and gratitude that we actually get to start a completely NEW year. I know we kind of take it for granted like it’s no big deal but to be fortunate enough for YET another chance to do stuff, improve stuff, IS, truly wonderful. Wouldn’t you say ❓

Haha, I just noticed how much I’ve managed to blabber. Hence, without an unnecessarily long outro, that’s all for today. I’ll see you next time. Take cares.

-Toto